Have you ever...

...stopped to ask yourself if at some point in time it'll be necessary to loose yourself of the friends you've "always had"? I am wondering if it's completely possible to maintain stable relationships with people you've been friends with for a lengthy period of time? I can't help but also think that this is probably a similar thing to ask when considering the concept of marriage.

People are supposed to grow and change together...right? What if they don't...like on their own? Is it your job as friend to help them grow up as you have? Or do you leave them behind amidst their stagnancy?

If you find yourself growing apart from your best friends...at what point do you break up with them? Or do you try? Do you think you could have grown so far apart that nothing is salvageable?  Or does that reflect your lack of trying...I dunno...lots of thoughts...

I see glimpses of the friendship that I know should still exist, but it seems like it moves too fast most of the time for me to take a picture of it to keep forever...or to even anchor it down so that every day after will be just a fruitful as the one before it/ I'm in between a rock and a rock, and a hard place on either side...and at the same time the ground is collapsing beneath me and my escape route is simultaneously disintegrating daring me to make a quick, fast decision.

Too much to think about and no one to sort it out with.

HawthoRNe (08.02.11)

Is it bad that I legit felt some of Christina's pain yesterday? Clearly I don't have the same problems that she has...like at all...but I do feel like I just need some one to talk to for a nondescript amount of time about anything and everything that roams through my head and maybe then I can uncover some lost memories or I can feel completely free because for the first time I have released all that there is to release.

Just a thought...

I'd hate to be...

...that person when every time I come around the air gets cold and still and I just bring down the mood. Funny how I work with two people who do just that. They bring down the mood of life. I really hate that for them, and I hate that for me b/c I don't particularly need randoms wreaking havoc on my life...and me having to use energy I need for other activities. I must be a human shield against negative energy and such...